How to buy a car

Here is a link to an article I read about a care salesman. Actually, it is a column writer for Edmunds.com that went undercover as a care salesman at two different lots and he gives the behind the scenes look at how they can screw you. It took awhile to read the whole thing but it was well worth it. You really need to read this before buying your next vehicle. Later.

D*ck in a Box

Here is a link to the “Dick in a Box” done on Saturday Night Live awhile back with Justin Timberlake. I happened to have purchased a “Dick in a Box” box Friday at Spencer’s. I will post pictures later of me modeling the “box” for all of you. The first video is on Youtube but has been taken off from time to time. Here is another link just in case the other doesn’t work. Enjoy. Later.

four wheeler/workhorse

The other day we had to move my son's Camero under the carport due to a thunderstorm coming and his window is missing on the driver side door; and a bad flywheel so the car won't start. Anyway, I hooked up the new four wheeler to the car to pull it in. I was amazed at how easy the four wheeler handled the load. It didn't strain or spin a single tire. I pulled it across the front yard in the grass and up a slight incline. It handled it better than I could have ever expected. Two thumbs up for Honda Foreman. Later.

Be sure to click on the picture to make it bigger. Later.

So simple yet so true. The old slogan "if you outlaw guns only outlaws will have guns" was true when it first came out and is still true today. Later.

Better than I thought I was

After trail riding Saturday, we went and put out corn and deer attractant at the lease near my box blind in hopes I would get to go hunting Sunday afternoon. I did get to go Sunday afternoon and I also brought along some leftover Thanksgiving sweet potatoes to spread out for the wildlife to enjoy. I was able to sneak out of work early last night and managed to squeeze in another hunt.

After not seeing anything again, I decided to test the sights on the scope to make sure they were still set. I picked out a chunk of sweet tater about 120 yards out put the cross hairs about three inches below. I figured I would get close and could see how far off I was by where the dirt had been hit in comparison to where the sweet tater was. I took aim, gently squeezed the trigger, and boom. I was shooting a 30.06 with a 3-9X40 scope. I saw the potato move and thought “hell, I am pretty close.”

I climb out of the stand and ride on over to where the potato was and to my surprise, I actually hit the damn thing. I couldn’t believe it. And I figured no one else would either so I took the sweet tater home and took a picture about five minutes ago this morning for proof. If only I could see a deer now. Later.

Festivus

Here is a video describing Festivus by the man himself, Frank Costanza.

That Guy

The following comment was left for my post when we went trail riding at Sandstone.

“What's next? you going to sit around and paint each others toe nails and share you feelings? Motorcycles are for men. You girl.”

I had this very conversation with the friend that invited us to go. I told him that I would be labeled as “that guy.” You know that guy that brings his woman everywhere he goes, or that guy that can’t leave the house without his wife because he is henpecked? Well, I am not “henpecked.” I am not “whipped”. I am just a guy who was lucky enough to marry his best friend. And I enjoy doing everything I can with her. I mean that is why we went and bought a new four wheeler; so that we could go riding together beyond this one trail.

Originally she was not going to be the only chick there; it just worked out that way. Oh I am sure that others from the group made comments. But I guarantee she did not hold up the group. She held her own and then some. Label me what you want. Just realize that I am happy being “that guy.” Later.

Here is a map of the trail we went riding on. I would recommend starting off on a shorter trail. This one is not only very challenging but very long. My ass starting feeling likeit had blisters on it and my hands were going numb. Had a great time though. Later.

This is what the new four wheeler looks like. Later.

Sandstone Trail

A friend called the other day and invited us to go trail riding with him, his family and friends at Kisatchie National Forest just north of Leesville, Louisiana. The trail in question is the Sandstone; a 31 mile trail for OHV, horseback, bikers, and hikers. Well, when he first asked me, I wanted to go but only had the Honda Rancher and the reverse didn’t work. I decided to go ahead and get it repaired rather I went riding with them or not. After talking to a Honda mechanic at Lake Charles Honda, I went home and fixed the problem myself for free.

Now I have one four wheeler and two riders; the wife and I. She doesn’t like riding as a passenger and has been trying to talk me into buying me a new four wheeler so she could ride the Rancher. Most guys would have jumped at the opportunity to buy a new toy, especially when the boss is asking you to. Well, Friday I went back to Honda of Lake Charles and talked numbers. I went with cash and a trailer just in case I decided to get one. And I did do just that. A 2007 Honda Foreman 500. I wanted 4x4 since the Rancher was 2x4 and I wanted one a bit larger for use at the hunting lease. I decided to go with the green again so that the two four wheelers would match.

Anyway, we met with the others in Dequincy and followed them to Kisatchie. My wife has never really ridden that much on a four wheeler. I have a dirt hill in the front yard I have been meaning to spread out that is about three feet tall. She won’t let me take her over the hill because she was scared to flip over. Let me tell you, the Sandstone Trail is an extremely diverse trail. One minute you are navigating through a creek filled with big rocks and the next you are climbing a hill with at least a 20 to 30 degree incline. Several hills and valleys are included in the trail with tons of obstacles including trees, slick rocks, down trees, sand, ruts and mud holes.

I could not have been any prouder of the way my wife tackled those obstacles. I couldn’t believe it. I followed her the entire time to watch and help when I could so I saw her every move. One time she did get sideways in the trail and almost flipped. I had to jump off my four wheeler and get her going straight again on hers. She handled it like a pro. And when a tough climb consisting of rocks, loose sand and a steep incline came up, she declined my offer to get her four wheeler through it and did it herself.

Up until the night before, I assumed that my friend’s wife was going along. There were about a dozen guys and one woman trail riding. My wife. She handled her own with the big boys all day. Her first time riding, a tough as nails trail and about four or so hours on the trail was no problem for her.

But when you look at it, a woman is better equipped mentally for trail riding. Think about it. A guy goes around a sloped curve almost wrecking and hitting a tree at 15 mph. He looks around to make sure his friends saw him and claims “that ain’t shit… I can do it at 20 the next time.” He tries it at 20 and wrecks damn near breaking is neck. Now the woman goes through the same sloped curve at 15 mph almost wrecking and hitting a tree. She gets off her ride and says “damn that was close…I believe I will take the next one at 10 mph.” It is amazing how much damage has occurred to men and property because they were trying to show everyone else how big there testicles were. Women don’t have that weakness.

Anyway, we had a great time and hopefully we will do it again soon. They also rent horses close to Kisatchie and we intend on going horseback riding after hunting season is over. Later.

1000 baby!

Well, I hit another milestone tonight at Anytime Fitness. I was able to burn over 1000 calories, 1014 to be exact, in one hour. I would have gone longer but the treadmill cuts off after 60 minutes. I have never busted a thousand calories before in one workout before. Now for some of you, this may just be a warm-up for the real workout. But for someone of my “roundness”, it is quite an achievement.

At about 58 minutes, I realized I was really close to making a thousand. But I knew I would have to step it up to get it. I had the incline maxed out and a heart rate of 170 for the last forty-five seconds to make it happen.

So now I am kicked back drinking a Heineken. I have tried a couple of new brewskies since I last posted. Killians Red wasn’t half bad. But it really had no bite. A little bitter, but after four of them, I really had nothing to show for it.

The other is Long Hammer Pale Ale. This one has bite baby. I let a co-worker try one the other day after work and after only one sip, he made this gagging sound and handed it back apologizing for not being able to drink it. I said no problem and finished it off. I have only had that one Long Hammer, but that baby let me know it meant business. I was very talkative after just one. I can’t wait to knock out the rest of them. Perhaps after I finish this 24oz Heiny, I will destroy those Long Hammers like Flavor Flav destroys the English language. YEAH BOY!

A co-worker and I went by Famous Foods on Hwy 14 on the way home tonight and picked up some boudain and cracklins. But not your ordinary cracklins. These were hot and spicy cracklins. A cracklin soaked in hot sauce and coated in a lot of seasoning. Not to shabby. I recommend them. They are not up to the quality of B and O cracklins, but are different in a spicy kind of way.

Well, I just finished that Heineken and now comes the Pale Ale, and not the kind Stiffler drank. I’ll let you know how the Long Hammers turn out. Later.